Get your act together with achievable goals

Now that all those new year's resolutions have decided to go into hibernation until next January, determine what you really want out of the rest of the year, and act on your decisions. Don't complain in December if you don't make a plan now

The beginning of the year is often seen as a time of renewal, a time to restart, reset and do the next 365 days better than you did the last.

It’s a time when notebooks and pens come out and new year’s resolutions, goals and aspirations are put to paper with the hopes that the things we write down will be ‘complete’ by the same time next year.

Everyone has good intentions in January, but as the month draws to an end many of our goals or resolutions have fallen to the wayside; we tried, life became busy, work became chaotic, things became difficult and we gave up.

Kate Schroeter, East London based Life and Success Coach and clinical hypnosis practitioner, chalks our ‘giving up’ or demotivation to multiple factors, including social media.

“Sometimes it’s a combination of life being busy and the goals having unrealistic timelines but the added influence of social media that has everyone getting used to quick releases of dopamine is just as detrimental to our motivation.

“Dopamine is a chemical released in the brain that makes us feel good. Scrolling on Instagram and watching reels of people’s lives causes a release in dopamine and makes you feel good. That is why people get addicted to social media and can land up scrolling for hours. This endless scrolling not only robs you of the time that you could be using to achieve your own goals but it also results in an information overload and a paralysis that affects the motivational drive of the brain,” Schroeter explained.

“So now when you want to work on your goals and you don’t see results fast enough. you’re not getting the dopamine hit that you’ve become used to and you lose the drive to continue. We want instant results or we give up.”

According to Schroeter, another blow to our motivation is failing to plan for the ‘ifs’.

“If your goal is to cut out sugar this year then what is your plan when there is an office birthday party? What is your plan when you go to a baby shower?

“We call it If/then planning; IF there is cake THEN I will have a cup of coffee and a sugar-free biscuit that I keep in my drawer. If your goal is to run 5km every morning but on week two it’s raining and you can’t go outside what is your plan; IF it rains THEN I will go to the gym.

She says planning for hurdles or challenges increases our chances of succeeding from 39% to 91%.

“Our brains are wired to repeat patterns that we have developed but from a neuroscience perspective our brain’s neural pathways can change. The more we do something the easier it gets, so in the beginning make sure that you have plans that support your new goal.”

A recent article featured in The Conversation suggests that the best advice to follow when setting goals is to set ones that are “SMART” — specific, measurable, achievable, relevant (to you) and time-bound.

While there are many writings advising the same thing, suggesting that this is a good place to start, doing the actual work to achieve these things takes much more than this initial step of setting the ‘right’ types of goals.

How do we stay motivated throughout the year? How do we get back on track if or when we falter?

If social media is part of the problem, Schroeter suggests it can be part of the solution too.

“It’s unrealistic to expect people to give up social media all together, though I do think that many people will start to go that way in the future, but you do have a choice about what you are consuming.

“Becoming intentional about who you follow on Instagram and making sure that you follow inspirational and motivational accounts that are aligned to your goals will have a positive affect on you achieving them.

“This goes for all forms of media not only Instagram. Watching too much news is just as bad for your motivation and can cause stress-reactions and even forms of PTSD that can cause you to lose interest in life and your goals.”

As with many things in life, timing is everything. Schroeter says honouring the season of our life, as it is right now and setting goals that align with that is also vital to our motivation and success.

“If you are wanting to launch a new business but you have just had twin babies it would be healthy for you to acknowledge that the majority of your time and energy would be needed to care for your young babies.

“It’s not impossible to launch your new business at that time but being honest with yourself will allow you to set smaller goals that will support our bigger vision,” Schroeter says.

Lorna Schofield, EL based psychologist and coach, says one of the most important questions to ask yourself when setting your goals is “what makes us want to achieve the goal?”

“Ask yourself: ‘what makes me want this?’ So that you understand what the goal means to you. We are more likely to achieve goals that are meaningful for us,” says Schofield.

“Humans have this amazing ability to imagine, but often these imaginings are beyond our current capacity so I think if we make our aspirations more about habits, practices and patterns we have more of a chance of succeeding and staying motivated.

“It’s lovely and I think it’s part of our mental entertainment to imagine these wonderful things for ourselves. Often these imaginings stay just that, imaginings. Their value can be to remind us to do what we are currently involved in better, with the diligence and effort it would take to achieve the big things.

“And when there is a big thing we want to achieve, there needs to be a how. We need to think about how we are going to do it. There’s often all these steps and looking at how much has to be done to get to where you want to be, can be overwhelming. ”

Yet, she says starting small and then adding on to ultimately reach your goal is helpful.

“If we just think about what the next sane step is and focus on that; start with small things and when those things start to feel comfortable keep adding on, rather than trying to make ourselves feel OK about subtracting or doing less, because we aimed too high at the get go.”

“I’m very influenced by the work of James Clear, author of Atomic Habits. He says that if you want to start something new, start doing it for about 2.5 minutes every day,” says Schofield.

“There’s something incredibly valuable in persistence and consistency. To keep trying is important,” says Schofield.

Much like Schofield’s advice , EL based biokineticist, fitness model and Dispatch columnist Katy Allderman suggests that focusing on habits can do wonders for your motivation - or lack thereof.

“My top tip for fitness motivation is that you will not always be motivated. Guaranteed, I have days, if not weeks where I would rather do anything else than exercise. The biggest factor that determines whether you will stick to your goals or falter, is whether you are able to make it a habit; have a plan and get it done before the day gets away with you.

“Habits are exactly that... habits. You don’t have to motivate yourself to do it... you just do it! As if you are on autopilot. So challenge yourself to move every day, maybe even at a similar time. Make sure you do any type of movement that you love even on days you really don’t feel like it, make sure you still show up and move.

“By being strict with yourself about just showing up will help create that habit. As this habit becomes more and more ingrained, you’ll find you have more quality sessions than not. You will always have some slow sessions, and that’s OK. Its just important to show up,” says Allderman.

Local personal trainer and group fitness instructor Sharonlee Moulang says when it comes to health and fitness goals people often set unrealistic, desperate or non-achievable goals for their body type, habits and present fitness levels.

“Usually their long-term goal

When there is a big thing we want to achieve, there needs to be a how. We need to think about how we are going to do it

is reduced to a short-term one as they want quick results. This never works and should be a long-term goal broken down into achievable and realistic short term goals. By checking the box of each achievable short term goal we remain motivated, making it more manageable to stay on track,” says Moulang.

“We all have to start somewhere and many times it’s at the bottom. Fitness is a lifestyle not a destination so start small and build up slowly. ”

Moulang says holding yourself — or having others- hold you accountable- can also be incredibly beneficial.

Training with the help of a personal trainer or with friends with similar goals gives you a support system and someone to hold you accountable.

“You feel the need to not to miss a session,” she says.

“A funny thing that also works for many is to pay for sessions in advance, giving you a sense of commitment over squandering hard-earned money. This way you feel your own pressure to return and become more committed.

“Fitness is like money, takes time to earn and quick to lose it all,” says Moulang.

As cliched as it may sound, there is also a lot to be said about a positive mindset when it comes to staying motivated; goals can’t work unless you really believe you can do it, adds Schroeter

“People focus on the goal but fail to focus on how they think about the goal -their mindset.

“Working on your mindset and adopting a view of the world as one in which you can see success all about you and believe in success for yourself, will change the way you show up in the world. A positive mindset changes how you deal with challenges and has a direct affect on your success,” Schroeter says.

She says developing a level of self-trust is important to achieve your goals.

“Most people don’t actually believe that they are capable of achieving their goals. They set them but deep down they don’t trust that they will achieve them. So I say start small, teach yourself that you do what you say you’re going to do; If you are going to shower as you are ready, say out loud: I am going to shower now. Then hop in. Now your brain is acknowledging that you said you were going to do something and did.

“Do this every day for a week and suddenly you have created a new neural pathway of success, you start to identify as a person who does what they say.

Then you can move it up to bigger things like going for a run, choosing healthy options off the menu, saving money, applying for study programs, or starting a new business and so on.

“It all comes down to how you see yourself and how much trust you develop within yourself,” says Schroeter.

For those who may have already faltered over the long and gruelling month of January or are struggling to stay on track, Schofield urges the importance of giving ourselves permission to restart, re-evaluate our goals, the steps we’re taking and pace we’re going at to achieve them and to be kind to ourselves.

“My invitation is not to focus so much on an annual beginning but more so on a daily beginning. We think of a new year as a chance at renewal, yet every day, every breath, is a chance for renewal.

” Have patience with yourself and work on how you can you craft your own way of realising your specific aspiration.

“The biggest thing to remember is that when our self-talk becomes kind, patient, encouraging and inspiring, we are very much more likely to achieve what we set out to do.

“When it is self-criticising and harsh it’s very difficult to achieve what we set out to do.”

“Don’t criticise yourself if you aren’t going through your steps as quickly as you first thought you would and do yourself the kindness of allowing yourself to re-evaluate your goals and how quickly you can progress.

“If necessary take different steps to get there. If it means enough to you and it is realistic enough, and you keep at it, you can achieve it,” says Schofield.